Monday, February 28, 2011

RedPoppy's 2011 Oscar Red Carpet Review

Last night's 83rd Annual Academy Awards felt like Amateur Hour thanks to a stony faced James Franco, a Glee club cheerleading Anne Hathaway, and Kirk Douglas, who managed to extended an already awkward telecast by a whole 15 minutes. Boy, I have never, ever been that overjoyed to see Billy Crystal. Ever! Thankfully the Oscars ceremony ushered in the final curtain bow for Hollywood's overblown, pompous, self congratulatory, and always visually stimulating Awards season. Let's face it, enough with the multiple gongs for a teary (but very well deserving) Best Actress who keeps thanking her fiancee for impregnating her, enough with"It's your year Mr. Firth" (though I am undoubtedly one of his biggest fans), and even though he mesmerized me in The Fighter I wish that just once Christian Bale would shut up, eat a sandwich, and lose the beard. YES you ALL did a wonderful job pretending to be someone else, now it's time to go home. In the meantime let's talk about what's important: the Red Carpet Fashions. Unfortunately this year's dress parade was rather disappointing as I waited in vain for those WOW moments which never came. Instead the red carpet was littered with many purple-hued looks and a whole lot of boring dresses I've already seen before (Reese Witherspoon I'm talking to you). On RedPoppy's Best Dressed list? Michelle Williams in white beaded Chanel Haute Couture, 14 year-old Hailee Steinfeld looking beautiful and age appropriate in Marchesa, fashion risk taker Cate Blanchett in lilac Givenchy Haute Couture (we'll talk about that front circle panel later), Matthew McConaughey's lady love Camila Alves stunning in black Kaufman Franco, a gorgeous Annette Benning in rhinestoned Naeem Kahn, and Amy Adams in navy beaded L'Wren Scott (we'll talk about that neckline later). And let's not forget the winners for Best Gongs of the night (scroll to the end)....And without further adieu let's look at the rest...
Michelle Williams is gamine and chic in Chanel Haute Couture.
Hailee Steinfeld is picture frothy perfect in Marchesa
Cate Blanchett in Givency Haute Couture. I like this. I really do. Although I can't help thinking that circle panel is a perfect place for a family photo...
Camila Alves is resplendent in Kaufman Franco. And her boyfriend isn't bad either
Annette Benning's rhinestoned Naeem Kahn dress is a show-stopper. Now that's how it's done!
Amy Adams in navy beaded L'Wren Scott. Navy + Redhead - unattractive mock neckline = Fabulous
Best-dressed family: The Bridges
Sandra Bullock in Vera Wang. Loved the dress, even loved the color. Did not love Sandy's 'touch me and I'll punch you' face. Too much botox, not enough sleep, or just plain p.o.'d?
Near, far, wherever she was, Celine Dion is back! Looking sleek and tres elegant in Armani Prive
Marisa Tomei looks like a vintage eggplant
Natalie Portman in violet maternity Rodarte.
If I was a country right now, I'd be Switzerland...

Javier Bardem: Perfecto. Hola, que guapo eres. Penelope Cruz: Utterly glowing from recent motherhood but also wearing utterly ugly and unflattering dress from 1996
Nicole Kidman (and hubby Keith Urban with a better blowout than you) looks like she won a Christian Dior dinner napkin fight. Also looks like she botoxed her hair bun...
Helena Bonham Carter showing us her Union Jack garter. Well at least someone's having a good time!
Resse Witherspoon recycling Julia Robert's look at the 2001 Oscars. I'm so bored, I'm getting slee...........zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz


Scarlett Johansson in Ggaaah! maroon lace Dolce & Gabbana. Lose the color, get back your hot ex hubby!
Gwyneth Paltrow is Country Wrong and tanorexic in Calvin Klein
James Cameron's Avatar: King's Speech Best Director winner Tom Hooper 

The Winners for BEST pair of GONGS:

Jennifer Hudson in Versace
Opraaaaaaah Winfreeeeeey in Zac Posen
Images courtesy of omg.yahoo.com
Camila Alves image courtesy of instyle.com
Last two photos courtesy of styleite.com

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